Kissing You
by SexyNeko13
Summary: Hikaru has feelings for kaoru but does kaoru share them? KXH
1. Life changing

Disclaimer: I don't own anything but my friend wants to put the twins in her closet so I guess she has kidnapped them.

Warnings: Twincest, Shounen ai

AN: This is my first Host club story so just keep that in mind.

Kissing You

Chapter 1: Life Changing

Kaoru's POV

It's been a week since that day. The day you looked at me asked if I cared for you…if perhaps I could love you. You stunned me; I didn't know what to say. At my silence you turned and walked away. Since that day our bond has started to weaken.

Normal POV

One Week Ago

Kaoru walked down the hallway twards the third music room, Hikaru went ahead of him instead of beside him for once. 'Hikaru sure is acting strange. He's never left me alone before.' Kaoru thought sadly. When he arrived outside the doors to the music room he found Hikaru leaning casually on the doors. Kaoru came to a stop beside Hikaru and waited patiently for Hikaru to move so they could go in. They were already late so Kyoya and Tamaki were probably having kittens by now. With a sigh Hikaru pushed off the doors and takes a deep breath "Kaoru?" Hikaru asked, his voice trembled as if afraid of something. "Yes?" Kaoru replied raising his hand to push some stray hair back behind Hikaru's ear where it belonged when Hikaru stopped Kaoru's hand "Do you love me?" Hikaru's voice was so quiet Kaoru could barely hear catch what Hikaru had said. "What?" Kaoru asked uncertainly. Hikaru released Kaoru's hand and rose his eyes to Kaoru's "Do you love me?" Kaoru blinks and replies "Of course I do. You my brother, my twin, my double how could I not?" Kaoru saw hurt pass through Hikaru's eyes "Is that all I am? Your other…y-your brother?" Kaoru saw tears pool in Hikaru's golden eyes. Kaoru's uncertain as to what to that when Hikaru sighed again and whispered "I love you…in a way I shouldn't. I think of you in ways deemed wrong by society. Do you think…maybe…someday you could love me…like you pretend you do…love me like I love you?" When Hikaru finished he walked inside leaving Kaoru to stare.

Kaoru's POV

Present

I close my diary as Hikaru walks into our room. When we go to bed the only think I can think of are the words he whispered to me a week ago and how after he confessed his love to me our act has become strained, at home we are so distant, and how his words still ring in my ears 'I love you' they have changed the way I think and me life forever. I keep thinking of him. I wrote in my diary today that I think I'm in love with Hikaru too but would he love me after what I did? We had my bed put back in our room but I can never get to sleep so I wait for him to fall asleep before I get back into his bed; and I wake up early to sneak back into my bed. I know it's wrong but how can something so wrong make me feel so alive?

End Chapter One

AN: so what did you think? Good? Bad? Sucked? Never write again? Let me know. Please R&R ppl tell me what you think.


	2. Thoughts of the heart

A special thank you to my first three reviewers

CityOfSpilledInk

KouroNeko1492

and AMC a.k.a. Annie May

Thank you for your support and I hope that you will stay with me for the rest of my story.

Chapter Two: Thoughts of the heart

Kaoru woke up the next morning wrapped in his brother's arms, like he had for the past week.

Kaoru heard "mmh" signaling to him that his brother was now waking up.

'shit I'm late' Kaoru mentally screamed at himself getting out of Hikaru's bed trying hard not to make any noise. As Kaoru started buttoning his shirt his brother got up.

'SHIT!'

"Kaoru?" Hikaru asked slightly disoriented "Are you alright? You look pale."

Kaoru turned to his brother "Yes Hikaru I'm fine." Kaoru stated before turning to finish getting ready for school.Kaoru's eyes widened as

Kaoru watched as Hikaru left to get into the shower before letting out the breath he was holding.

'Whew that was close. I should be more careful.' Kaoru thought while finishing up in the bedroom and going down to breakfast.

Hikaru came down ten minutes later to eat quickly then go off to school.

After School Host Club

'One week, One day, Four hours, and 12 minutes since I told him and we've changed so much already.' Hikaru thought watching his twin on the other side of the room.

'Does he hate me that much now. Does he hate me because I love him?'

Kaoru was talking to renge about the "brotherly love" act and what was going on when he felt a stare on his back.

Slightly turning he saw that it was Hikaru that was causing the tingles to go up and down his spine.

'What the hell?' Kaoru thought to himself 'Why is he staring at me like that? It's almost as if he's...sad. Hikaru looks like he's going to cry!'

Without thinking it through Kaoru rushed to his twins' side "Hikaru! Hikaru are you alright? What's wrong?" Kaoru asked pulling his brother into deep hug.

Hikaru blinked in supprise and tried to get out of the embrace "Nothing is wrong Kaoru. Everything is just fine" Hikaru stated finally getting free of Kaoru's grasp.

"Why would there be ANYTHING wrong with me? We fight ALL the time right? There is NOTHING to get worked up about right?Ignoring your sibling is OK though right?

Leaving your twin ALONE is perfectly FINE! H-hurting me is j-just fine r-right?" Hikaru screamed and broke into tears "W-why? Why don't y-you love m-me? What d-did I do w-wrong?"

Kaoru jumped back as if he was smacked "W-what? Hikaru what are you t-" Kaoru froze as relization kicked in.

'It's because of ME. I made my brother cry!' "I-I'm sorry Hikaru I-I didn't mean to hurt you like that I just. I'm not ready for a- well... It's not you it's me and I'm so so sorry." Kaoru finished backing up until

He reached the double doors and then did the last thing any thought he would do. He turned and ran away from his brother leaving him in tears and all alone.

Hikaru hadn't talked to him last night not even when Kaoru had asked him for the homework assignment for there last class.That night was the only night in a little more 17 years that Kaoru had not slept in bed with his twin.The next day Kaoru didn't even bother going to school pretending to be sick. When he told his mother he was sick and was staying home Hikaru turned and left without a word.

The whole day Kaoru spent lying in Hikaru's bed. 'Why? Why can't I just tell him? I care I really do so why can't I just say so?' Kaoru hugged Hikaru's pillow close to him and sighed "I hate myself."

Kaoru whispered before falling into a peaceful sleep with the scent of his brother surrounding him.

"KAORU! WHAT THE HELL?!"

End Chapter Two

AN: I've already started chapter three so it should be out soon. So what did you think? Good? Bad? Sucked? Never write again? Let me know. Please R&R ppl tell me what you think.


	3. Dreamy Thoughts

A special thank you to my first three reviewers

CityOfSpilledInk

KouroNeko1492

and AMC a.k.a. Annie May

Thank you for your support and I hope that you will stay with me for the rest of my story.

Chapter Three: Dreamy thoughts

Kaoru was rudely awakend by the person screaming and shaking him.

"What?" Kaoru stated sleepily turning over to face his dream killer.

Kaoru's eye's widened when they came to rest on his twin 'Oh Shit! Shit! Shit! Shit! Just how are you going to get out of this one Kaoru?' He mentally screamed at himself while looking at his brothers' confused face.

"What are you DOING? Your in MY bed!" Hikaru yelled clearly upset at the fact that his twin was in _his_ bed.

"I-I'm sorry Hikaru..." Kaoru said pleadingly "It's just well...you bed was more confortable a-and I"

Hikaru cut in growling dangerously at his brother " You just what? First you break my heart. Then you ignor me. Now your sleeping in my bed! What the Hell is wrong with you? Get out of my bed!"

Hikaru pushed Kaoru to the floor and glared at him. Kaoru looked up at his brother and saw the hate in his eyes but he saw something else there too, something he couldn't define and it made him feel warm and protected inside.

With a sniff Kaoru got up off the floor and slipped into his bed. 'Maybe there is hope for us yet' Kaoru thought falling back asleep and dreamed of someone holding him and whispering sweet nothings in his ear, being kissed by someone who smelled very familier...but who is it?

Hikaru waited until he was sure that his brother's breathing had deepened before walking over and sitting down beside him. Hikaru softly brushed Kaoru's bangs off of his face and smiled softly.

"I miss you Kaoru but why? Did what I have to say scare you so much that you couldn't stand me? and now you..." Hikaru took a deep breath holding back tears "And now you sneek into my bed and try to act as if nothing has happned. Why? What are you thinking Kaoru? For once I don't know and it scares me."

Hikaru contemplated with himself for a second before giving in and leaning down and pulling Kaoru close ,like one of their acts, only to bring their lips together for a second before he laid his brother back down and made sure to cover him before leaving the room.

Kaoru waited until Hikaru left before opening his eyes and sitting up toching his lips with his fingers.

"Hikaru..."

Kaoru said to himself dream-like before realising it. "Kaoru sat there whispering Hikaru's name and remembering the sensation of his twins lips on his and felt bubbly inside at the tingling in his lips he still felt.

Five minutes later he sanped out of his dream-like state by the realization of what had happened.

' My brother just kissed me...and I _Liked_ it...Oh God! Now what?'

Kaoru layed back down and pulled the covers up to his chin.

Kaoru fell asleep whispering to himself.

"It's gonna be ok. Everything is going to work out. Loving your brother is not wrong...right?"

A.N. Sorry for the short chapters but wow this ones even shorter than the others. Insperation just would not help me on this on and I had started writting this before I posted chapter two so yeah...Sorry for the slow and pitiful update. R&R tell me if you like it or what I can change to make it better.


	4. Breaking the Ice

A special thank you to my reviewers

CityOfSpilledInk

KouroNeko1492

and AMC a.k.a. Annie May

Cosmic Fairy

anchivies

and Tomomoomo

Thank you for your support and I hope that you like the finale chapter of 'Kissing You'

Chapter Four: Breaking the Ice

Kaoru plotted of some way to get Hikaru alone long enough to talk to him and he didn't have a clue on how to do it.

"Kaoru! Hikaru! The car is here!" Their mother shouted at them.

"Coming mom!" was the reply as the twins came down the stairs, kaoru two feet behind his brother.

'How can I persuade him to talk to me? I haven't really spoke to him for ...a long time' Kaoru sighed heavily and turned slightly so he could look at his brothers' face 'Hikaru...'

At School

"Welcome!" The host's sang as their customers for the day arrived. "Hello princesses! Come in a find the man of your dreams!" Tamaki ranted as the hosts took their patrons into their part of the music room.

Kaoru watched Hikaru from across the room and sighed sadly. "Kaoru-sempai?" one of his patrons asked softly "hm?" "Ano, I-it's just you seem so lonely with out Hikaru...It feels different and your not...um...well your not looking very happy. It's like you don't want to be here." The girl said blushing slightly. Kaoru turned to her shocked 'Can everyone see that I'm unhappy? C-can _he_ see I'm unhappy?'

After Host Club

"Hikaru! Wait up!" Kaoru shouted as he ran towards his brother. "Hikaru!"

Hikaru stopped and turned his head, an annoyed expression on his face. "What Kaoru?" malice was present in his voice, which caused the blood to drain from Kaoru's face.

"H-hikaru?" Kaoru reached his brother and tried to get his mouth to work. "Ano...Hikaru...um..."

Hikaru sighed "I'm going home Kaoru" Hikaru turned to leave and Kaoru reached out to Hikaru stopping his retreat.

"Hikaru please! I really have something important to say."

Hikaru sighed. "Fine! Then let's go somewhere we can talk without interruptions" Hikaru stated glaring at the rabid fan girls staring at them and leaded his brother to an empty science room

locking the door and pulling the blinds down. 'At least no-one will see this, It's going to go bad I just know it. I shouldn't be doing this. I'm such -'

"hm hm" a impatient cough from Hikaru brought Kaoru out of his musings. "r-right." Kaoru took a deep breath and as calmly as he could walked over to stand in front of his twin.

"Hikaru do you remember when we started fighting? What you said to me that day?" Hikaru glared "Yes I remember perfectly how easily you rejected me. How easily you let me walk away from you.

I don't see how this is relevant to our conversation though."

Kaoru stared at his feet "um...well...you see I...you and lo...um..." Hikaru tapped his foot impatiently.

'Well actions _do_ speak louder than words' Kaoru though as he reached out and wrapped his arms around a startled Hikaru's neck pressing their lips together.

'This is truly heaven' Kaoru thought as Hikaru went from tense to relaxed and compliant. A tongue snuck out of Hikaru's mouth to lick Kaoru's lips.

A soft moan escaped Kaoru's lips as Hikaru's tongue slipped inside his mouth slowly tasting everywhere. They stood there kissing for a while before finally breaking apart.

"H-hikaru I'm sorry I-I didn't realize my feelings at first. I-I'm sorry I hurt you-"

Kaoru was cut off with another paooionate kiss. "It's fine." Hikaru said and smiled giving his twin a hug.

"Kaoru"

"hm?"

"I love you"

Kaoru smiled "I love you to onii-chan".

The End

A.N: I want to thank those who stuck with me and I hope you will like the ending. I might start another story soon I'm thinking a death note or a hunni mori one so I hope I'll see you all soon.

Thank you allot for your reviews they mean allot to me.

See you soon!


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